


the bad place!

by GlitterCake20



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Jurassic World Fusion, BAMF Sam Wilson, Crack Treated Seriously, Dinosaurs, Jurassic Wolrd AU, Light Angst, M/M, Modern Bucky Barnes, Pining, Skinny Steve Rogers, Thirsting, lots of cussing, lots of running
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-24
Updated: 2019-01-24
Packaged: 2019-10-15 16:06:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,760
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17531897
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GlitterCake20/pseuds/GlitterCake20
Summary: “Tower A come in please. There is a rogue predator. I repeat, there’s a fucking carnivore roaming the front fields. Come the fuck in.”Only static follows. Sam repeats the request with no avail.“Steve… Stevie… that’s a fucking—Christ that’s…”“A big mother fucking dinosaur!” Steven Rogers and his angel mouth says. Bucky’s only heard Steve swear three times in their 18 years as friends. Once when he broke one of his tiny arms tackling Bucky, another time when he got real drunk and Bucky dared him he couldn’t, and now, when a massive dinosaur is about to eat them alive. “Bucky I told you!!”





	the bad place!

 

 

For Bucky’s birthday, he doesn’t want to go to dinner, or a movie, or have people over. No. He wants to go to Jurassic World. He wants to see dinosaurs and ride in the little glass balls between their feet like a hamster while he eats candy floss.

 

Steve says no.

 

Bucky buys the tickets anyway.

  
  


At the big dino themed gates that open before them, Steve shuffles to keep up with the mass of people making their way through. Bucky turns to find him right behind his shoulder. Steve’s short so he kind of speaks into Bucky’s armpit while cowering away from the guards and their massive guns.

 

“What if they get out of the cages Buck?”

 

“How’s that… that won’t happen again okay?” Bucky says nudging his shades up on his nose. “It’s like a zoo, basically.”

 

Bucky hears the scoff at that but carries on walking with the rest of the tourists, Steve close by. It’s pretty hot, so he’s thankful for the loose vest he chose to wear, the fact that he’s paired it with black super-skinnies, that are a squat away from crushing his balls, is irrelevant.  Besides, he’s grown more confident with his new bionic prosthetic arm and this vintage Rolling Stones vest with the massive red tongue on it is the perfect chance to show it off, and you can’t wear vintage vests with anything else but black skinnies.

 

Steve however opted for ‘practical’ gear, which means cargo pants, and a t-shirt and boots where Bucky’s wearing Vans. Oh, and a floppy safari hat because Steve’s a dork like that. Bucky’s contemplating buying a cap and how it’ll compliment the outfit, when the group comes to an abrupt stop and a man’s voice booms through speakers disguised as plants.

 

“Welcome to Jurassic World!”  a wrinkled, silver haired man who introduces himself as Alex Pierce walks out onto a rock platform, huge projections of the park beaming up behind him,  “Here, dreams walk the earth and limits only exist in your mind. We have some of the world’s oldest predators roaming peacefully beside us. Spinosaurus...”

 

“Ooh, sounds fun right?” Bucky elbows Steve’s skinny ribs while the man carries on with his speech naming various dinosaurs and talking like he’s generally full of shit.

 

“Sounds like an STD.” Steve says dryly.

 

Bucky just rolls his eyes. Steve’s never been overly excited about these geeky, fantasy things as much as Bucky has. Steve’s more of a numbers and statistics guy, realistic and explainable.  Still, he’s Bucky’s oldest and best friend and he’ll force him to have fun even if it kills them both. “Steve! Come on buddy. This is gonna be—who the fuck is  _ that _ ?”

 

“Language Buck.” Steve’s voice stays impassive with the reprimand but he turns his head to see who has caught Bucky’s attention, “Who’s who?”

 

And just then a glorious, beefy man steps onto the platform with Alex. God, Bucky just about drools. He’s tall, about Bucky’s height, and he’s dressed in all black (just like Bucky-eek!) tactical gear from head to toe. Earpiece, utility belt, a huge fuck-off rifle, thigh straps with more guns- all the things Bucky’s wet dreams are made of.

 

“That!” says Bucky and points but Steve has already noticed.

 

“Oh he’s totally your type.” he whispers.

 

“I now introduce your park ranger. This is Ranger One. We call him Sam. You can just call him yes sir.” the man laughs at himself and Ranger One only quirks up the side of his mouth.

 

Alex Pierce tells them about the ins and outs of the park, how much money it generates per annum, what the upkeep costs are and a few tourists intervene with some questions. One of which is “what measures have been taken to avoid a repeat of what happened back in the nineties”

 

The grey haired guy goes a little stiff but smiles and answers like he has done so a million times, “I assure you, our security systems are of the most advanced yet. We have integrated various components from the world’s top safety companies, into one all-encompassing web that protects this park. But our rangers are fully equipped to handle any incidents-”

 

“Oh great so there can still be incidents!” Steve groans, “I could have been home with Tony you know. Did you know Saturdays are sloppy joe days and Pepper makes homemade ginger ale?”

 

“Are you eighty Steven? Huh? Jesus. We’re literally gonna see dino-fucking-saurs and you’re reminiscing about sloppy joes and the good old days. It’s a weekend, and it’s my  _ birthday _ . So suck it up Stevie.” and with that Bucky stalks off to the front of the stage, right under Ranger One’s nose and away from Steve.

 

Steve immediately regrets his whining, “Oh come on. Wait! Buck! Come... I didn’t mean it that way!”

 

Only a little while later he feels Steve scoot up to him again but this time with a peace offering. He holds up a disgusting pink and white and lavender monstrosity with a unicorn horn in the center. Bucky thinks it is a cupcake, he can’t be sure, “Hey. Fluffy unicorn?” Steve says and smiles meekly.

 

Bucky glares at Steve and his stupid hat but feels like laughing just a little, “Well this is dramatic.” he takes the thing and looks down at his grunge outfit and bad-ass bionic arm and… the pink fluffy unicorn cupcake in its grip.

 

“Okay listen, I’m sorry. I don’t really hate it here. It’s just... Tony and I’ve been going through a rough time you know. And I thought spending as much time together as we could would help.” Steve suddenly looks like a kicked puppy. Bucky literally wants to tell him that being a billionaire’s sugar baby is nothing to look so emo about, but he doesn’t.

 

“That just makes it worse Stevo.” he says sympathetically and takes a bite of the fluffy frosting.

 

“I know. We both just work so much you know, don’t ever have time to just be us.”

 

“Look, it’s gonna be fine, he loves you and your tiny little sugar ass.” Okay he can’t _ not _ make sugar baby jokes, “You’ll see.”

 

“I’m his boyfriend not his sugar baby, Bucky!”

 

“Yeah. Sure Steve. Hey, how about we go see some fuckin’ dinosaurs, huh?”

 

The dreamy ranger is put in charge of the group and herds them out to the field. And while his ass looks fantastic in those black cargos, Bucky is kind of engrossed in the surrounding scenery. It’s all jungle looking with huge trees and vines and large grassy terrains, beautiful.

 

Ranger One turns to them and starts a quick brief. He’s stoic and to the point and reminds Bucky of a drill sergeant. One thing is sure, he knows what the hell he’s doing, even Steve seems slightly more relaxed.

 

“Here is what you ain’t gonna do out there. You ain’t gonna wander off, or kick up a commotion or scream when you see a goddamn dinosaur. That’s why you came, ain’t it?

 

“What you  _ are _ gonna do is fucking listen to me. Follow my orders. When I say run you haul ass, when I say shut up I don’t even wanna hear you blink. No flashes, no puttin’ your damn Snapchat filters on the animals okay??? And no fucking bullshit.”

 

Steve, unimpressed, mumbles, “He is perfect for you with that mouth.”

 

“Fuck. I _ know _ .” Bucky says and makes a needy little sound that causes Steve to go red in the face.

 

“Not like  _ that  _ Bucky. Jeez.”

 

Bucky laughs and smears a dollop of frosting onto Steve’s flushed cheek while Steve flails around to slap him away.

 

“Oh hi? Excuse me.” Ranger One calls out, “Am I interrupting your little unicorn party, huh? Want me to wait ‘till you’re done, Cupcake?” He’s looking right at Bucky, eyes making a slow swoop down his figure.

 

Bucky flounders and shoves Steve away even though he started it, “Uh no, no. You can…” and he makes a rolling motion with his free hand for the beautiful man to carry on.

 

“Fuck me.” Sam mutters, rolling his eyes. “Anyway-”

 

This time they don’t talk but Bucky only really takes note of half the rules because he’s more transfixed on how Sam’s arms flex and how his pecs twitch when he moves in that impossibly tight shirt.

 

“That gun is  _ so _ big.” whispers Steve, kind of frightened, kind of in awe.

 

“Shh!”

 

“Are there any questions?” Sam finally asks after what feels like forever.

 

“Yeah,” Bucky whispers back to Steve, “is that a gun in your pants too or...”

 

They both burst out laughing and it earns them a stern glare from Bucky’s future husband.

 

Sam proceeds to dump pair by pair into a little hamster pod with a staunch I’ll-have-you-for-breakfast look and shuts the glass door for them. Bucky and Steve are next in line. Steve, wide eyed and fidgety; Buck, thirsty and staring.

 

Sam turns to them, carefully considers Steve then asks Bucky, “What’s his problem?”

 

“Oh, he gets all flushed and bothered around guns.”

 

Sam goddamn smirks at him, “What about you Cupcake?”

 

Bucky loses his mind.

 

A loud metallic click follows and makes Steve shudder beside him as Sam deftly cocks the gun and raises a brow. Bucky has never seen anything hotter in his life, he thinks, and it occurs to him that he may just be a tiny bit in love. Sam sees the look on his face and frowns.

 

“I’m… is that supposed to be hot? Why...” Steve stutters.

 

“I feel like he could take a dump in a bag and it’ll be hot.” Bucky supplies, thoughtful, and with extreme heart eyes that he makes no effort of hiding. There is something to be said for his unbridled approach to the things he likes.

 

He gets into the little pod beside Steve, it’s all mechanics and smooth lines and buttons which amplifies sounds, shifts window panes for a better view. God knows what else. It has Steve proper intrigued but Bucky’s attention is still fixed on Ranger One who struts down the row of pods and gets into his own one.

 

The comms inside crackle to life and Sam’s voice graces his ears.

 

“There is a radio in each one of these for emergencies. The red button. They connect straight to me.  _ For emergencies _ .” he makes that last part crystal clear.

 

The pods start rolling—like hamster balls just like Bucky imagined—and spread out over the field. Once they teeter over a hill Bucky sucks in a deep breath because  _ holy shit… _

 

There they are! Big beautiful, majestic creatures with long long necks and even longer tails. They move gracefully, nibbling on high tree tops and some curiously lean down to inspect the pods. Faintly, Bucky can hear people yelping and squealing with delight in their pods.

 

Bucky grabs the radio.

 

“Ranger One!! This is fantastic!”

 

He takes a few pictures of a Triceratops and her baby sprinting off into the distance, and he does in fact put a Snapchat filter on so it looks like little hearts spiral around her horns. Who is gonna stop him?

 

“Ranger One!” Bucky says again, excitedly, “They are  _ so _ pretty.”

 

Another herd of whatever-saurus graze past them, giving the pods a little nudge. Beside him, Steve laughs. It’s all pretty magical.

 

“Ranger One….” he clicks the comm button again, but Steve grabs the radio from him and gives him a terrible look because as much as Steve is a doo-goodie he’s also a little shit at the best of times.

 

“Marry me Ranger One!!” Steve yells in his best Bucky voice, accented and on point.

 

“STEVE!”

 

Ranger One beeps in, sounding like he just rolled his eyes into space.  _ “I said this comm was for emergencies only!!” _

 

“Yeah, he needs to marry you real bad—OW!! Okay okay!!”

 

“I’m gonna fucking kill you Rogers!”

 

Amidst their laughter the pod jerks to an abrupt stop and they drop the comm. Bucky’s cussing profanities while he leans down to pick it up, feels Steve incessant pat pat pat on his back. “I swear, you’re so fucking-”

 

Bucky sits up and meets a pale,  _ very _ pale, and frightened looking Steve. He is almost green. Bucky follows his gaze.

 

“OH. MY. GOD… Oh my—”

 

Sam’s voice interrupts his panic and Steve’s trance, _ “Stay inside your vehicles. Do not move.” _ he orders through the radio, and from way in the front Bucky can see him reverse his pod back slowly since a massive dinosaur—one that clearly doesn’t belong out here in the open—is now square in front of Sam’s ride.

 

_ “Tower A come in please. There is a rogue predator. I repeat, there’s a fucking carnivore roaming the front fields. Come the fuck in.” _

 

Only static follows. Sam repeats the request with no avail.

 

“Steve… Stevie… that’s a fucking—Christ that’s…”

 

“A big mother fucking dinosaur!” Steven Rogers and his angel mouth says. Bucky’s only heard Steve swear three times in their 18 years as friends. Once when he broke one of his tiny arms tackling Bucky, another time when he got real drunk and Bucky dared him he couldn’t, and now, when a massive dinosaur is about to eat them alive. “Bucky I told you!!”

 

The animal lets out a deafening roar. Bucky thought it’s a myth that things rattle and shake when they roar like that but it’s not. Their pod quivers with the force and all he can see is a huge, bloody, gaping mouth with rows and rows of teeth.

 

At that people jump from the pods and start running a few get swooped up by the dinosaur, hauled into the air like a play thing and then seemingly swallowed whole. Another gets chopped at the waist and Bucky chooses not to note where the other half falls.

 

In his seat where he watches terror unfold, Steve is about to  _ Pass Out. _

 

_ “What did I just say!? What. Did. I. say!?”   _ Sam screams infuriated and helpless over the comms, making Bucky feel ridiculously sorry for him in that moment. He can’t imagine the heap of shit you’d get into for getting half (lol) of your group killed by a dinosaur.

 

“Should we…” Steve tries some semblance of speech, one hand clutching Bucky’s metal one, the other already trying to pry open the door.

 

Now James Buchanan Barnes will be a damn idiot if he lets Ranger Sam down like the rest of this group, well, what’s left of them, anyway.

 

He pulls Steve’s hand back from the door, “You wanna try your luck out there alone with that thing or with this dude?”

 

Steve considers and makes a quick decision, “True. True.” Then he tries the comm again, “Uh, Ranger One? What the hell are we supposed to do here?”

 

They watch Sam’s head swivel around to them, incredulous, before he screeches into the radio,  _ “Of all the people!!! Of all of them you’re the two who don’t jump ship?? How??” _ and then much calmer, realising probably that it’s his job to get them to safety now: _ “Okay, just stay put. Shut up and don’t look at it.” _

 

“Don’t look at it?” Bucky cries out, “It’s a fucking dinosaur Ranger One?!”

 

_ “Don’t… I swear. Shut up!!” _

 

The dinosaur—Bucky wishes he’d paid attention to the names before—stomps around and bites aggressively at one of the balls with jaws so big its mouth covers it totally. It hasn’t noticed two of the pods are still occupied, but once he does they’re goners for sure.

 

_ “I’m gonna make a run for your pod, scoot up.”   _ Sam says and his door slides open, once outside he starts running, crouched down behind the pods.

 

“He’s coming in here.. Oh god Steve.”

 

“Stop will ya!”

 

Sam crashes into their vehicle, there’s a faint noise from the door sealing again and that’s enough to have the animal’s head whip to them with an angry huff.

 

“Stay still, stay super, super still.” Sam freezes, squeezed between the two of them, barely space for him and his huge guns. Bucky wants to both laugh about his stupid joke and cry because he doesn’t want to die, but he does neither because Sam  _ fucking  _ Sam is pressed tight to his side and he can smell him and feel him and Baby Jesus he’s gorgeous.

 

Steve, Bucky is sure, tries not to rattle as loud as he is but it’s futile. And just then the dinosaur makes a horrific sound that slices right through their veins, ice cold. “I think he saw us… What’s he doing? Why’s he making that noise??”

 

Bucky’s eyes go wide, “Oh god… he’s-”

 

“He’s calling his friends. We gotta go!” Says Sam and suddenly it’s to hell with keeping still. He yanks the cart into gear and Dino notices, comes right for them. Bucky tries really hard not to scream but Steve doesn’t share the sentiment. He sounds worse than the dinosaur did.

 

To neutralize the craziness in the tiny pod, and appreciatively to calm Steve down, Sam asks,  “Okay, what’s y’all names?” while swerving the ball around this bend then that, while this huge Fuckasaurus chases short on their tail.

 

“I’m Bucky. He’s Steve.” he answers, dropping his phone and gripping whatever he can (it just happens to be Sam’s thigh) as Sam suddenly hits reverse and they skid backward between Dino’s legs to throw him off.

 

Bucky is hell of impressed with this man’s badassery he’s almost hard. From the corner of his eye and very fleetingly he sees a man standing by the tree lines with a camera way too big for a tourist but too many things happen at once and his brain stores that information away.

 

As they slide back, so close Bucky can see each scale on the underside of the animal’s belly, Sam gives them a look with his face pulled, unimpressed.

 

“So... Cupcake and Small-ass.” Sam says so final that’s just how it is. And if that tone doesn’t just go straight to Bucky’s groin. He forces, begs, his inner slut to behave and just survive somehow so these thoughts can materialize. But not now.

 

“Ah man,” Steve groans in protest, “Just Steve will do, you don’t gotta-”

 

He’s brutally interrupted by the pod jolting sideways and a deep throaty roar right above them before the dinosaur’s massive foot connects with the ball and sends it flying straight into the overgrown outskirts of the terrain and into the sturdy trunk of a tree.

 

Then there’s just darkness.

  
  


Bucky’s not aware of much when he finally regains consciousness, he only hears Steve’s voice calling to him frantically and there’s warm liquid on his face that taste like salt and copper and it’s really gross. Steve’s muffled voice is joined by another gravelly one saying the word cupcake over and over.

 

_ “I gotta cut him loose and you need to calm down okay? Just chill.” _

 

_ “We’re gonna die!!” _

 

_ “No one is dying Small-ass!”  _ the rough voice says _. _

 

It’s only when Bucky is suddenly released and lowered from the constraints of his seatbelt that he realises he’s been in an accident. Another accident. And then he freaks the fuck out. He remembers the crash that claimed his arm and the pain and the blood, the sound of crushing metal and burning tyres. That’s all he can sense now too, and he starts shaking.

 

“Hey! Hey look at me. You’re safe, it’s only a minor laceration alright, you’ll be fine.” Two really big, warm hands cup his face on either side, bringing him back. He remembers now, Ranger One with the arms, he was holding his leg in the pod… Sam. “Yeah that’s it. You’re fine, see?”

 

Bucky blinks and blinks and blinks until Steve’s face comes into focus, relieved and flushed and terrified all at once. “Hey Buck? You okay?”

 

“Your nose is  _ so _ big.” he croaks, bleary and squinting.

 

Steve rolls his eyes and falls back on his ass. “He’s fine.”

 

Bucky swallows and looks back to Sam, whose hands are still plastered to his cheeks, and Sam’s face falls into relief too he even smiles a little. Bucky bites his lip and Sam’s eyes raptly follows that movement then shoot back up to his eyes.

 

“Uh, yeah… we should… your head.”

 

“Uh huh…” says Bucky and silently mourns the loss of Sam’s hands on his face in favour of digging a band-aid from his utility belt. He also mourns his phone that lies squashed under the pod and Steve’s which is submerged in a puddle of mud.

 

Steve watches them, gaping as Sam squats down between Bucky’s open legs while Bucky revels in it, the pain in his skull only a mild distraction. Steve shakes his head at Bucky while he gets a band-aid stuck to his forehead and his messy mop of hair swooped away before Sam catches himself being soft and backs off.

 

“Thanks Ranger.” he says in what he thinks is his sexiest voice.

 

Sam’s fully recovered from sexually tense moments apparently because he pulls himself up and absently says, “Sure thing Cupcake. Now listen-”

 

And as quick as that he’s back in ranger mode, pulling up a small map to route the way. But now there’s that moment, and he looked at Bucky like that and well Bucky is like gum under a shoe. He’s not letting this go.

 

So the thing is: They have no idea how the dinosaurs escaped or where they’re currently treading about. According to Sam’s route the safest way back to the control tower—where they can either find out what’s happening or call for help since all their means of communication is now in disarray—is through the jungle areas.

 

It’s a nasty trek. It’s muddy and dense and wet from earlier rains. Bucky’s Vans are ruined, sludge coming up to his ankles and for a moment he envies Steve’s practical hiking boots. Sam leads up ahead with his rifle drawn just in case, Bucky and Steve following closely through the thick shrubbery and ominous pools of rainwater. All things considered though, it’s a really beautiful place.

 

After about a century of hiking they stop near a small waterfall to catch their breaths. Steve throws his skinny body out on a rock and sighs dramatically, Bucky sits beside Sam on another flat rock.

 

“Hey, thanks for getting us out of there.” Bucky says real quiet, and bumps his metal shoulder into Sam’s.

 

“Yeah man, no problem.” Sam gives him a sad look, “I’m sorry your trip got ruined.” he sighs, defeated.

 

Bucky turns to him, rubbing at the plates of his arm, “What do you think happened? Why was that thing out there?”

 

“Don’t know, man.” Sam rubs his face. “These predator cages are so secure, you need a fingerprint just to get in and out, the walls are too high for them to jump over even if they could. There’s no way they could’ve gotten out. Someone fucked up.”

 

“And your radio? Why won’t they answer?”

 

Sam shrugs, “Maybe the animals got in… Maybe they got in before a warning signal could be sent to the comms. They would have warned us you know.”

 

“Hey Sam,” Sam looks at him with pretty brown eyes and his stomach flips, “Are we gonna make it?” he asks earnestly.

 

Sam gets up and straightens himself out, extends a hand to pull Bucky to his feet and says, “Fuck yeah, we’re gonna make it. No one’s getting eaten on my watch.”

 

Bucky, now close to Sam’s chest, nods and he’s totally ready to just kiss the shit out of him right now.

 

“And Cupcake…” Sam drawls, hand still in Bucky’s, “You got some unicorn frosting—right here.” he taps his own mouth corner and looks away with what Bucky swears is a smirk.

 

He swipes at his mouth and dies internally because that just means Sam was looking at his lips again and he thought the same thing Bucky did. Probably. Maybe. Hopefully.

  
  


Another unsurprising surprise awaits them once the control tower comes into view. And really, by now, Steve should not be yelping the way he does when he sees a dinosaur. But yet…

 

“Hey man!” Sam scolds, “Shut up!”

 

Steve claps a hand over his mouth and mumbles an apology. They remain undetected for now, crouched behind large shrubs. 

 

“Hooo my god.” Bucky panic-whispers and taps Sam on his bulging bicep, “Oh shit. Are those…” 

 

Standing between them and the entryway to the tower is a small gathering of Raptors, maybe five, and they’re munching on what must have been their handler, making satisfied little noises while they feast. Steve gags.

 

Their wide open cages occupies Bucky’s attention for a few moments. And again, just like the man with the huge camera by the tree line, something about the scene seems incongruous, something that he just can not place.

 

Sam hands his rifle over to Bucky, “If anything happens, you shoot and then you  _ run _ .” A hesitating expression worries his features, “Shoot the dinosaur. Don’t shoot me.” he clarifies then climbs out from their hiding place and makes his presence known to the animals.

 

“What are you… hey!!” He calls after Sam. “Jesus, is he going in there??”

 

Steve’s gone sheet-white when Bucky turns to look at him, bewildered by Sam’s antics. “Buck, I’m gonna puke.”

 

“Steve? Come on man.” he shoves and elbow into Steve’s ribs but rubs a few circles on his back so he’ll feel better.

 

Bucky watches through the scope of the rifle as Sam hauls a piece of feeding meat from a bucket and hooks it up to a chain, careful and precise movements to not startle the already volatile predators.

 

“Oookay.” Sam breathes in deep and then back out. His muscles tense in his back and shoulders as he approaches them. “Okay you ugly little shits. Nice and slow…. nice and slow.” he lures them back to the cage, small steps, one hand outstretched to keep them at bay. Bucky prays they don’t bite his arm off. It’s a glorious fucking arm.  

 

“I feel like he’s from a video game.” Steve, now a brighter color, whispers beside him.

 

Bucky nods dreamily, “Black Ops but like, level 900.”

 

“Look. They’re going, they’re leaving.”

 

Sam coaches them inside seemingly effortless, “Yeah, yeah it’s meat. You like meat huh, I got a big—whatever this is—right here. There you go. That’s it.”

 

And then the raptors are in the cage, Sam’s backed up enough to shut the gate just as one comes sprinting at him. The steel slams shut, and he bolts away from the door while the dinosaur snaps its jaw through the slats.

 

“Let’s go!!!” Sam shouts, holding his hand out for the rifle as they all start running uphill toward the tower, laughing.

 

“That was fucking amazing!!” Bucky yells, hysterical with adrenaline. Sam smiles, equally pumped up.

 

Steve, behind them, is hollering with a different intensity, “They’re behind us!!! Behind us!!” and his skinny legs jerk up to his chest as he tries to gain ground.

 

Bucky has a terrible, dreadful feeling, because he’s one hundred percent sure that they won’t be able to outrun a pack of raptors.

 

Sam flings around with the rifle aiming past their heads but he doesn’t shoot and when Bucky turns to see why he nearly rips at the seams with laughter.

 

It’s a pack alright, but of the smallest minute little things he’s ever seen and even if Sam yells at them to keep running because  _ these baby fuckers gonna eat our balls _ while he picks them off one by one with the rifle, Bucky just wants to splay out in the long grass and have them nuzzle all over him like puppies. They’re so cute.

 

“This is the bad place, Bucky!!!” screams Steve as one of the little ball eaters clings to the back of his cargo pants and he cups his dick for dear life.

 

“In there! Go go go!” Sam points to an open glass door and Bucky hauls Steve along by the arm. Once inside he begins closing the door and Sam makes it in just in time, leaving the little dinos to smash against the glass unceremoniously.

  
  


Once up in the tower, Sam’s suspicions are confirmed. Most of the staff have been killed or have fled leaving the place abandoned save for the body count. 

 

Bucky goes straight for the vending machine and breaks the glass with a chair, feels pretty badass as it shatters and clangs to the floor.

 

“Man, what the hell??” says Sam, exasperated, “You wanna let them all know we’re here, huh?”

 

“Coke?” Bucky smiles coyly, holding up three cans. Reluctantly Sam rolls his eyes and takes it.

 

“Look at this.” Sam pulls up one of the cage monitors, “This wasn’t an accident.”

 

“What does that mean?”

 

He points to the corner of the screen. “See how there aren’t any broken locks, all the gates are just….  open. Means the dinosaurs didn’t  _ try _ to get out… Someone let them.”

 

“The guy with the camera… there was a dude with a camera, one of those big movie ones, out on the main field. Who would do this though?”

 

Sam’s face falls a little, “Someone who’d benefit from a publicity stunt like this.”

 

Another monitor flickers on and they turn to it with a startle. It’s the old grey dude, Mr. Pierce, looking unscathed as he grins at them. Bucky can’t tell exactly where he is, but he’s obviously not running or hiding from any dinosaurs.

 

“ _ Someone _ who knows an opportunity when he sees it. I’ve always wanted to get into filmmaking.” he purrs all smug.

 

“People died!!!” Sam snaps, “You ruined hundreds of hectares of this place, how is this--”

 

“Fifty, perhaps seventy million. That’s what we could make off of a movie, with real live footage to boot! Can you imagine, Sammy? Our park in a big motion picture. I reckon Robert Redford can portray me, what do you think?”

 

“Man, can you shut the hell up you demented old--”

 

An unexpected squeal resounds just then as huge beak swoops down and gobbles Mr. Pierce right up, feet dangling out of shot. They all step back, gaping. And if that wasn’t the most satisfying thing Bucky’s ever seen...

 

“Woah!!!”

 

Steve’s got a firm hold of Bucky’s bionic arm, “Oh Jesus... Okay. Holy shitfuck. I should be used to this by now, but...” Foul mouthed Steve is turning out to be Bucky’s ultimate favourite fighter.

 

“Well then!” Sam shuts the monitor off and Steve gathers himself enough to start fiddling with the radio control panel, trying to find a frequency that works.

 

“I can manipulate these to connect to Tony’s A.I.”

 

“Who’s Tony?” Sam asks through gulps of Coke.

 

“Steve’s sugar daddy.”

 

“He’s not-”

 

The radio crackles to life to their amazement, and Tony’s voice scolds from the other side,  _ “--hacking my A.I, who are you, you little shit!?” _

 

“Tony! Tony, listen!!”

 

_ “Ah?” _ Tony sounds pretty confused,  _ “Stevie??” _

 

“Yeah! Listen, we’re in trouble babe, I don’t know if we’re gonna make it out of here. I need you to know I love you, you’re my angel, you’re my light baby. I’m sorry for everything that went on lately, I just need you to know I’ve been my happiest when I’ve been with you. You’re it for me baby. I love you so much Tony.”

 

Sam, under the impression that they are calling for help and not woeful last goodbyes, blinks and blinks again. By the third blink Bucky realises—much to the amusement and delight of the soft squishy parts of him—that Sam is in fact crying.

 

Oh.

 

Bucky leans up casually against him, “Oh, okay, so you’re a real I’ll-blow-your-head-off-and-shit-down-your-neck kinda guy, but  _ that  _ drama gets you?”

 

With a sniff and a quick rub of his eye Sam clears his throat, “Man, I don’t know what the hell you’re talking about. Got sand and shit in my sinuses that’s all.”

 

“Sure,  _ Sammy _ .”

  
  


_ “I love you too Steve, I love you so much right now, but Jarvis and I literally just hacked the satellites overhead the park and we’ve got an aerial view of all the clear escapes routes. He’s apparently not just a butler, huh, who knew?” _

 

“Oh jeez Tony! I literally love you!!!” Steve says all teary, like Sam and even Bucky would cry if he was so inclined.

 

_ “I love you too baby!! Okay listen up--” _

  
  


So Tony, the rich sugar-not-daddy, will come to their rescue. He’s sending a helicopter to the assembly point on the roof of the tower.  Bucky feels like they’re all going to fucking die anyway and this is just that dumb hopeful moment in a movie.

 

He doesn’t say anything because Steve’s cheeks are pink with optimism right now, and Sam is sexily barking out orders and Bucky’s got a semi from just watching him.

 

“There is one problem.” Sam says and turns to them after fastening the straps of his harness and picking a gun off one of the dead guards.  

 

Bucky knew it, “Of course there is. What?”

 

Sam points out the window, across the grassy distance to a flat grey building, “Helipad is locked for unauthorised use. The keys are in there.”

 

‘In there’ is currently being circled by a fucking T-Rex.

 

Bucky sighs, “Can we kill it?”

 

“Not with the type of ammo we got, no.”

 

“Okay.” says Bucky, full of valour, and looks at Sam. “Hold my Coke.”

 

Sam’s staring at him voiceless but takes the can of Coke. Bucky’s about to be really idiotic, and who knows if it will be worth it. “I ran track in high school, got medals and shit. You can thank me later.” he says and places his hand on Sam’s shoulder. “You’re a beautiful son of a bitch, just know that.”

 

“... What?”

 

With that he turns and runs, sprints in fact, to the building with the key.

 

“Bucky!! You were high, you weren’t even on the team!!” Steve shouts at his back, it doesn’t throw him off in the least, “They were participation medals— _ Bucky _ !!!!”

 

Bucky makes it about halfway across the field before his chest starts heaving and the Coke threatens to make a reappearance. He turns back to find Sam and Steve now following up behind him.

 

Sam’s yell-whispering, mightily displeased. “Un-fucking-believable!!!! Unbelievable!!! Hey!! What the fuck you doin’ Cupcake??”

 

Sam doesn’t see the huge dinosaur emerging from behind the tower.

 

Bucky freezes, puts his finger to his mouth, “Shhh!”

 

“Is he… did he  _ shh _ me—hold this.” Sam shoves his gun into Steve’s hands and storms toward Bucky with furious intent. He’s incredibly hot when he’s mad.

 

“No! Sam wait!” Steve calls out, because he  _ does  _ see the dinosaur.

 

“Hey you reckless fucking shithead!!” 

 

Steve starts running as fast as those tiny legs will go.

 

Bucky watches this all in slow motion: Sam’s confused full-body swing, his mouth making an ‘O’ when he too, starts running. Steve hauling ass, blonde hair flopping, mouth wide open in a scream and the huge animal resembling Steve’s expression somewhat but with an ear piercing roar behind them.

 

The three of them make an impressive skid into the grey building, by a miracle only, and the dinosaur crashes into it, leaving a massive gaping hole in the roof. It’s thankfully much larger than the building and can’t get it, not that it doesn’t try.

 

Pressed against a steel locker, Steve hyperventilates again, Sam’s rifle rattling in his hands. They all stay really still, hoping the thing will lose interest and head off, but it’s still nudging and prodding at the doors and windows as if it knows that’s the way in. Bucky’s starting to really question the intelligence of these animals.

 

Out of breath and crouched behind a desk, he asks Sam across the aisle from him, “Are we gonna die?”

 

Apparently still fuming at Bucky’s hero attempt Sam scowls back, “Hell yeah we’re gonna fucking die.”

 

They look up to find the T-Rex with its mouth now in the hole, headed straight for Steve’s head and Bucky is suddenly terribly afraid that they all are truly going to die and be played by awful actors in a low budget film.

 

“Oh my—Buck??” Steve trembles wearily, the dinosaur inches away from his head.

 

Bucky does the only logical thing he can think of. He screams.

 

“HEYYYY!!! HEY GODZILLA!!!! YEAH, TAKE A HIKE ASSHOLE!!”

 

Sam beside him, astonished tries to stop him, “Woah—No!!! What the shit--”

 

And then a glorious thing happens. T-Rex jerks up, tilts its head sideways like a puppy at Bucky who is standing there holding his breath, staring it right in the eye. It gives Bucky a quizzical stare, if they are capable of such things, then honest to God huffs and walks off.

 

What. The. Fuck.

 

“Got the key!!” Sam announces and holds up a small bunch of keys, properly smiling this time.

 

Steve’s headed for the door already, Bucky grabs Sam’s hand and to his surprise he lets him, “Run!!”

 

“You think?? You fucking psycho!!” he laughs incredulously, “Did you really just  _ yell _ at a T-Rex?”

 

Bucky shoots him his best smile as they make their way back across the field to the tower. “Worked didn’t it?? Was gonna eat Small-ass”

 

“You’re insane! Do you know that??” Sam says breathy and stupid attractive, squeezing Bucky’s hand, “Lord. I think I’m in love with you Cupcake. Jesus.”

 

An unappealing snort escapes Bucky, “What?!”

 

“Listen.” Tony’s helicopter circles above them, “Shut up. When we get out of this shit show alive, I’m gonna kiss you so hard.”

 

That makes Bucky’s heart leap and a smile split across his face, “Is it weird that I’m turned on right now?”

 

Sam hides the smile that’s formed on his lips by looking away, “Totally man. Get it together.”

 

They’re inside, bounding up a spiral of stairs to the rooftop where Sam fiddles with the keys to find a match for the lock, Steve catches his breath behind them with his hand on his knees, still clutching Sam’s rifle. For someone scared of guns he sure seems pretty at home with it.  

 

Over the helicopter’s whirring blades outside Bucky shouts, “Why not just kiss me epically in the middle of all the chaos like in the movies?!”

 

Very simply and reasonably, Sam replies, “Because we’re not fucking stupid and I’m tryna live?”

 

“Huh. Fair.”

  
  


Tony hovers the steel bird above the helipad and drops a ladder down, lowering his glasses to salute them. Bucky’s never been more thankful for Steve’s boyfriend. They let Steve climb up first, since he’s just about in tears at the sight of Tony, and he practically leaps into Tony’s lap in the pilot seat and then kisses him in a way that makes Bucky look away.

 

He’s still mid thought when Sam wraps an arm around his waist and hoists him up, already clinging to the ladder. And they take off, dangling together, their faces only inches apart and Sam’s arm solid around him.

 

Bucky swings his bionic limb around Sam’s neck for better grip but also for romantic effect and grins sheepishly at him.

 

“I’ve never met anyone like you Cupcake.” Sam shouts. His eyes drop from Bucky’s and fall to his mouth instead and then he kisses said Cupcake until his legs start getting shaky.

 

Sam’s lips are really soft and smooth against his own, and tastes a little salty because you know, they were just chased by a T-Rex and all. But it’s fantastic and dreamy and he’s nursing that semi again.

 

It makes a pretty romantic picture: Dangling from the helicopter ladder, with Sam’s huge arm around him, the warm sunset breeze hitting them and blowing Bucky’s hair all over the place and into their mouths.

 

Sam pulls away and laughs, Bucky thinks he’s ten times more beautiful than when he first saw him eight hours ago.

 

“You tellin’ me you’ve never met a dude who eats unicorn cupcakes and yells dinosaurs into submission?”

 

Sam’s mouth quirks up and this time he doesn’t try to hide it. He squeezes Bucky’s middle tentatively before he looks him in the eyes and whispers against his lips, “Nah, only you.  _ So fuckin’ crazy man. _ ”

 

They kiss again, probably hundreds of meters above the earth now while the sun glows orange-peach on the horizon and light misty rains start to fall.

 

Bucky has to admit, as far as epic movie kisses go, this one takes the damn (cup)cake.

 

 


End file.
